never mess wit u kno who

Mr Baker,
As an employee of an institution of higher education, I have a few verybasic expectations. Chief among these is that my direct superiors have anintellect that ranges above the common ground squirrel. After yourconsistent and annoying harassment of myself and my co-workers during thecommission of our duties, I can only surmise that you are one of the fewtrue genetic wastes of our time. Asking me, a network administrator, toexplain every little nuance of everything I do each time you happen tostroll into my office is not only a waste of time, but also a waste ofprecious oxygen. I was hired because I know about Unix, and you wereapparently hired to provide amusement to myself and other employees, whowatch you vainly attempt to understand the concept of "cut and paste" forthe hundredth time.
You will never understand computers. Something asincredibly simple as binary still gives you too many options. You willalso never understand why people hate you, but I am going to try andexplain it to you, even though I am sure this will be just as effective astelling you what an IP is. Your shiny new iMac has more personality thanyou ever will. You walk around the building all day, shiftlessly lookingfor fault in others. You have a sharp dressed useless look about you thatmay have worked for your interview, but now that you actually haveresponsibility, you pawn it off on overworked staff, hoping their talentwill cover for your glaring ineptitude. In a world of managerialevolution, you are the blue-green algae that everyone else eats and laughsat. Managers like you are a sad proof of the Dilbert principle.Seeing as this situation is unlikely to change without you getting a fullfrontal lobotomy reversal, I am forced to tender my resignation, however Ihave a few parting thoughts. 1. When someone calls you in reference toemployment, it is illegal to give me a bad recommendation. The most youcan say to hurt me is "I prefer not to comment." I will have friendsrandomly call you over the next couple of years to keep you honest,because I know you would be unable to do it on your own. 2. I have all thepasswords to every account on the system, and I know every password youhave used for the last five years. If you decide to get cute, I am goingto publish your "favourites list", which I conveniently saved when youmade me "back up" your useless files. I do believe that terms like"Lolita" are not usually viewed favourably by the administration. 3. Whenyou borrowed the digital camera to "take pictures of your mothers b-day",you neglected to mention that you were going to take pictures of yourselfin the mirror nude. Then you forgot to erase them like the techno-moronyou really are. Suffice it to say I have never seen such odd acts with aketchup bottle, but I assure you that those have been copied and kept insafe places pending the authoring of a glowing letter of recommendation.(Try to use a spell check please, I hate having to correct your mistakes.)Thank you for your time, and I expect the letter of recommendation on mydesk by 8:00 am tomorrow. One word of this to anybody, and all of yourlittle twisted repugnant obsessions will be open to the public. Never f***with your systems administrators, because they know what you do with allyour free time.Sincerely,
T. Brewer